when i had the chance

I love you, not for what you are,
but for what I am when I am with you….

 

Roy Croft.

                I should have told him this when i had the chance. 

                I never really had the chance to tell him how much he’s changed me and how different i am now from what i was back then. 

                I am different when i am with him. 

                Too bad i can’t tell him this now. Things are different from the way they were before. 

Live the present; savor the moment

They are good friends now. They spend their free time together and do almost everything together. Just like the old times. Not much has really changed between them.

Those three words are still left unsaid. Maybe its better that way. At least no one gets hurt.  They don’t fight over petty things anymore and they laugh at jokes that only the two of them can understand. Nobody’s crying and no one feels sorry for hurting the other. Yes. It is better that way.

for them, the present is what matters the most, They don’t talk about  their past, nor do they talk of the future. no what ifs, might have been and could be. we are living in a world of uncertainty. Things may change tomorrow; who knows? What’s important is that both of them are happy now.

I’m getting used to it

Maybe some people are really better off as friends.

There will always come a time when two people decide to not be committed to each other anymore. They have their own reasons for doing so. 3rd party maybe? One of them got tired of loving too much and giving too much. Nasasakal ung isa. Pwede ding they both still love each other but they can’t be together anymore. Bakit? Masasaktan lang kasi sila pareho.

They still see each other even though they’re not together anymore. She can still feel that he still loves her but sometimes she doubts if there is still intimacy between them. There still is but maybe they are both not sure if what they’re doing is right.

No more fights, no more arguments.. They are happier than before. No commitment but they know that there are still emotions. Those three words are left unspoken between them. Nakikiramdam sila kung sino unang magsasabi nun. But both are scared of how the other might respond.

i can’t believe that it has been a week already.

i can’t even remember the pain that i felt when we both decided that it was over.

Im happy. We’re both hapy with how thing are right now.

which hurts more?

choice 1:

Breaking up because of a 3rd party

choice 2:

Breaking up, still in love with each other, yet you can’t be together anymore.

Letting go is the hardest part when you’ve gotten used to a person being beside you whether you need him/her or not. You can’t imagine life without him/her. Yet you still have to accept the fact that you have to move on with your life without that person.

You love each other but you both know that the two of you are not ready for a commitment just yet. You’re both young and should be out there to enjoy life. At your age, why should you get serious with things such as love?

……

One of you gave everything to make the relationship work, forgetting to love herself in the process. She gave up her happiness just to make you happy. A typical martyr.

You on the other hand do everything you want to do. Bisyo, babae.. Lahat. You didn’t even consider what she might feel when you do all those stupid things you know will hurt her.

Yet, she did not give up on you. She hoped against all hopes that you would change your old ways and be a better man one of these days. You admitted that you’re not ready to change just yet. You still want to enjoy your life.

She accepted your decision to stick with your old ways and convinced herself that you’re young and nagpapakasaya ka lang.

…….

Some things aren’t meant. That’s just how life is. you won’t get everything you want.